Thursday, December 31, 2015

The Open Door

I've opened the door and am waiting,
in the beginning it is easy,
I'm sure they wouldn't forget,
and even if they did,
I won't be so self-righteous as to blame them for it.

Of course this time was different,
I told no one,
they would have to really remember it to really pass my silly test
and so I sat by my open door,
gaily observing the passersby,

All at once I recognized a familiar face,
and a warmth grew inside of me,
I knew they would remember,
but before I finished my thought,
the face was lost in the sea of faces that rushed past my door,

alas, it was his loss,
there will be more,
I just have to wait.
The sun was beginning to bear down now,
the rush seemed to have ceased,

There we were,
just me and my open door, waiting,
I brought my lunch to the door,
lest I miss someone who remembered,
My lunch was done and my spirit seemed to run out too,

I grew anxious and as the hours passed by,
the anxiety turned gradually,
into disappointment, I had dinner inside,
having given up hope, and yet after dinner,
with slightly raised spirits I stationed myself once more, at my open door,

and looked out into the darkness that had enveloped the street as night had fallen,
The bleakness of the night slowly, unknowingly,
was devouring me,
What was just disappointment,
had deteriorated into an internal lamentation,

a trickle of a tear appeared at the edge of my eye,
my heart was divided,
should I surrender to this trivial sorrow,
or should I dispassionately resume life,
where these minutiae have no meaning,

As I pondered, the trickle had transformed into a stream,
my digits were confused,
as they were drenched in salty tears,
suddenly my heart seemed to push against my ribs,
I felt an inexplicable discomfort in my throat,

I eventually fell in a heap,
and began sobbing and continued sobbing till I don't when,
and all this while, my eyes keep looking out,
through my open door,
hoping for someone, anyone